I Was Anxious in Paradise Until I Learned This About Rest

Woman sitting by ocean with coffee, text overlay “What a WiFi-Free Island Taught Me About Rest”, representing intentional rest and slowing down

If you only take ONE thing from this post, let it be this. Choose intentional time. For example, tonight, when you push back the covers as you climb into bed, set a 3-minute timer. Put your phone to the side and have your evening tea or hot chocolate in complete intentional silence for that period. That’s it.

Now let’s start.

The Maldives Vacation That Broke Me (In the Best Way)

As I was packing for our Maldives holiday, I felt exhausted, snappy and completely drained. I was barely holding everything together. I had zero mental space left because of too many deadlines, decisions and expectations. The end-of-year stress was crushing me. Followed by the worst and traumatic travel experience (you can watch it here on YouTube), and something inside me just broke. Nothing dramatic. I just felt defeated. Like I’d be living the same exhausting life on repeat forever, because nothing ever really changes.

“I’d been looking forward to this holiday for months,

but when we arrived, I was anxious. Here I was in paradise,

and I was anxious because it felt like I had something to do.”

When Paradise Feels Like Prison: My Anxiety About Doing Nothing

You know what’s funny? I’d been looking forward to this holiday for months. Counting down the days, daydreaming about being back on an island, and finally having time to relax. But when we got there, I was actually anxious about doing nothing. My body was on vacation, but my mind was still at home, in full survival mode. Still running through my endless to-do list. While trying to relax, I kept checking my phone, and planning my next video in my head, all out of habit. You know the dance of opening apps, closing them, hopping between them just to check.

Signs You’ve Forgotten How to Rest:

✗ Your “relaxation” involves scrolling through your phone

✗ You feel guilty when you’re not being productive

✗ Even on vacation, you’re mentally at work or planning work

✗ You listen to podcasts or audiobooks while doing everything (even “resting”)

✗ You can’t sit still without feeling anxious

✗ Your downtime has become another task on your to-do list

On the second day, we took a boat to one of those Pinterest-perfect islands. I brought my laptop to upload that day’s experience. But somewhere between the crystal-clear water and my screen, it hit me:

I’d forgotten how to rest and live in the present moment.

Somehow my body didn’t know how to be still and comfortable anymore.

Maybe you’re like me. Maybe you’ve noticed that even your “resting time” is productive:

“We’ve become so good at surviving our days
that we’ve forgotten what living feels like.”

While on the island, there were stretches of time that we were without WiFi. At first, I was very uncomfortable, because that meant I had to sit with my own thoughts while doing nothing. It was like my hands wanted that action of scrolling and my mind wanted to be entertained. I quickly realised that this is learned behaviour that felt foreign if I wasn’t doing it. But the more time I spent intentionally interacting with Andrew, because there was no WiFi available, the better I felt. I started reflecting on the past year and the new year for the first time in years. That constant fog of exhaustion lifted just enough for me to realize that I’d been living without any intention at all. Just surviving and reacting to life.

The Big Revelation: Planning Isn’t About Adding MORE

Here’s my lightbulb moment that I want to share with you.

Real planning isn’t about adding MORE to our plate, it’s about:

✗ Protecting our space and reality

✗ Building memory-making moments TODAY

✗ Creating experiences that will carry us through dark times with the ones we love

✗ Living intentionally, not only reactive

What is Intentional Time?

This is a simple action that can be surprisingly complicated to achieve. For instance, if you’re a busy mama with little ones, you don’t have much time between making snacks and cooking the next meal, so intentional downtime could be difficult to find. If your life season is busy and overwhelming, choosing to spend intentional time playing with the kids could be your form of intentional downtime.

The secret? Plan downtime. No matter how short or “insignificant” it might seem.

But here’s what I discovered this holiday. Five intentional minutes spent with someone you love beats an hour of scrolling while trying to rest.

What Intentional Downtime Actually Looked Like while on holiday:

✗ We planned when we’d exercise, swim, or eat (no Wi-Fi)

✗ I had uninterrupted conversations with Andrew during times without my phone

✗ Or I allowed myself to daydream and reflect without guilt

✗ I sat in silence without planning the next thing, just enjoying the view

Your Daily Peace Practice (No Island Required)

Pick ONE moment each day where you’ll practice being present instead of productive

At home, it could look like:

✗ Putting your phone away and REALLY playing with the kids

✗ Sitting in your car for 3 minutes after grocery shopping (just sitting, not planning)

✗ Having your morning coffee in a different spot, anywhere that breaks autopilot

✗ Eating dinner with the family, without any devices

✗ Taking a shower without rushing through it

✗ Walking to the mailbox and actually noticing the weather

A Note for Different Seasons:

Listen, if you’re in a life season where even this feels overwhelming, that’s okay. This season will pass. It will not last for ever. Sometimes all we need is to survive another day, and that’s enough. Please don’t feel guilty for doing nothing, choosing to take a break from taking a break means that it’s purposeful, not default or defeat. But make sure you have an end date in mind. When that time comes, re-evaluate your position and see if you are ready to start living purposefully again.

For those of us who want to live more intentionally rather than being thrown around by daily life. We need to plan these moments. And hopefully, one day soon, we’ll wake up and find ourselves (literally or figuratively) on an island with time to reflect.

Your Next Step:

I’m not saying you need a Maldives vacation to figure this out. I’m saying that my uncomfortable holiday forced me to see what I’d been avoiding:

I’d been so busy surviving that I forgot to plan for living.

Real, present connection with the people we love is what actually recharges us. Not another productivity hack. Not another self-care purchase. Just presence.